Chapter 248

“Aunt Tori, did you come for my birthday?” Jake greeted her with a hug.

“I sure did.”

“You didn’t come for my birthday.” Romeo pouted.

“Well, no, I was in L.A. But I sent you a present and called you special, right?”

His little face lit up and he hugged her. “Oh yeah!”

Stephanie took Tori’s present to put with the rest, and Romeo took her hand to lead her into the den where the family had gathered. This was just a family dinner tonight. Dorothea was having a party with all of Jake’s friends on Saturday. She settled onto the couch with a contented sigh, acknowledging to herself that she was probably going to need help getting up. Jesse pushed a footstool in front of her. She smiled and set her feet on it. “Thanks Jess.”

He shrugged. “Mom always said it made her feel better to put her feet up.”

“It does. Thanks.”

Romeo stood beside her, a frown creasing his little forehead. “What’s the matter Big Man?”

“There’s no room for me.” He gestured towards her rapidly diminishing lap.

“No I’m afraid Peanut’s taking it all right now. You can sit here beside me though.”

“Is him moving?” He asked as he climbed up on the cushion next to her. Jake took the one on the other side.

“Yes he….or she.. is. Want to see something really neat?” Both boys nodded. Tori lifted her shirt to bare her stomach and waited.

“What?” Jake looked confused.

“Just wait a minute and you’ll see.” Just then the baby visibly moved to one side.

“I saw it! I saw it! Wow!” Jake’s eyes were round. Tori looked up at the adults and exchanged smiles.

“Do it again!” Romeo demanded, one finger poking her gently.

“Well, I can’t make him do it, we’ll have to wait and see if he’ll do it on his own.”

“Sure you can.” Dorothea informed her, rising and heading to the bathroom. She returned with a washcloth soaked in warm water. Crouching in front of Tori, she placed it on the side of her swollen belly opposite the baby. Suddenly, the baby moved towards the warmth.

“Cool!” Steph crouched beside her mother. Even Jesse stepped closer to watch.

“Very cool.” Came from above her head. She tilted her head to see Jon standing behind the couch and watching. Meeting her gaze, he set a hand on her shoulder, squeezed and bent to kiss her forehead. Her eyes filled with tears at the thought of what Richie’s reaction might have been. She blinked rapidly. Don’t feel guilty! HE did this, not you! Although she knew her inner voice was right, it didn’t make her feel any better.

They were settled back in the den after dinner and Jake was just finishing opening his presents when the phone rang. Dorothea answered it, then handed the phone to Jake.

“Hi Uncle Richie!”

Tori stiffened. The adults – and Steph and Jesse – looked in her direction. “You don’t have to talk to him if you don’t want to.” John Sr. assured her.

“But you’re going to have to deal with him at some point.” Jon reminded her.

“Yeah…uh huh….yeah…it’s cool…..yeah…thanks…yeah, she’s here.” Jake held the phone out Tori. “He wants to talk to you.”

Tori stared at the phone for a long moment, then took a deep breath and reached to take it. Deciding she didn’t want an audience, she started to stand up. A few grunts later she gave up. “Jesse, stop it and give me a hand.” Jesse could hardly stop laughing long enough to pull her upright. “Thanks. Brat!”

“Tori? What’s the matter? Are you alright?” Richie could hear the grunts and groans at the other end.

“That’s a loaded question, but if you’r referring to what you just heard, I was sitting on the couch and, well, Peanut’s making me slightly less agile these days and Jesse was too busy laughing to help me.” She answered as she headed for the back door, closing it quietly behind her.

There was silence for a moment, then he sighed. “So Peanut’s really growing huh?”

“Yeah.” There was that guilty feeling again. She pushed it away. “Missing out on these things is a consequence of the choice that you made Rich.”

“I know.” He hesitated. “Angel, I’m sorry.”

She flinched at the pet name. “Why Rich? Can you explain that to me at least? I gave you…..everything I had. Obviously it wasn’t enough. So, what was I missing? What can she give you that I can’t? Was it because she’s more beautiful than I am? What made you choose her?” The tears were running freely. She ignored them.

“I didn’t! I told Heather that it wasn’t going to happen. That a part of me will always love her, for Ava, but she’s not what I need or want in my life. You are. Tori, I chose you! You are more beautiful – inside and out – than she will ever be. You’re right. You’ve given me everything. Everything I could ever want or need, and much more than I deserve. I know I fucked up, but angel, I love you!”

“What about the last four months? What the hell was that? If you love me and you want me, then what decision did you have to make? Why was there a choice at all?”

He raked his hand through his hair. “I had to be sure. She…she seemed to be a different woman….more like the one I married. I had to be sure that I wouldn’t always be wondering ‘what if’. That wasn’t fair to you. To do that I had to spend time with her – with the new her. I knew it would be hard for you to understand – especially with the hormones affecting you so strongly. I didn’t want to upset you unnecessarily.” She snorted. “Yeah, I know, that didn’t work so well. But I swear that’s what my intentions were. I didn’t want to hurt you. I know I did, badly, and I’m sorry.”

She sighed. “How’s Ava?”

“Pissed at me. Missing you like crazy.” He paused. “I need to apologize for that phone call too. I already have to her. I didn’t mean for that to happen. I wanted to talk to you and you wouldn’t take my calls. I knew that you’d take hers. I had hoped that you wouldn’t want to be the one to tell her and you’d act like nothing was wrong. I didn’t mean to hurt her, I just wanted to talk to you.”

“What did you tell her?”

“That Daddy is a stupid idiot and a fool. She told me to smarten up, fix it and get you and Peanut back home real quick.” She smiled, but didn’t comment. “Since we’re on the topic of children, you don’t really think that I only wanted you to give me a child?” Silence. “Come on Tori, after everything we talked about in Hawaii?” His tone was reproachful.

“Well it never got put to the test did it? I got pregnant right away, so how do I know?”

“Angel, please believe me.” He didn’t know what else to say. “I love you!”

“And that’s supposed to make it all better? I’m just supposed to believe you? How can I trust anything you say ever again?”

He wanted to growl in frustration. “I know I have a lot to make up for, and I know that I have to earn your trust all over again. I’ll do whatever it takes. Will you come home – no shouldn’t be travelling. I’ll come to Jersey and we can sit down and talk this out face to face.”

“You can go wherever you want, but I’m not ready to see you right now. Not yet.”

“Baby, please just give me another chance!”

“I don’t know if I can Rich. I need to really think about this. I’m not sure I buy your explanation. I don’t know if it’s enough.”

He sighed. “Will you at least talk to me? Let me try to convince you?”

“Okay. But I’m not making any promises. You hurt me Richie. You made me believe that I was special and that we’d be together for ever. That we’d have that fairy tale ending. Then you showed me that fairy tales are for kids, and not all stories have a happy ending.” The tears started again.

Richie felt the ball in the pit of his stomach that had been there since she’d walked out the door, tightened even more. “I’m so sorry angel. Tell me what I can do to make it right.”

“I don’t know. I don’t know if you can.” She felt her emotions starting to overwhelm her. “I gotta go.”

“I’ll call you later. I love you Tori. If you don’t believe anything else, please believe that.”

“Bye Richie.” She hung up and let the sobs come, her shoulders shaking with them. A blanket suddenly appeared around her shoulders. Even though it was May, the evenings were still cool.

Jon silently gathered her in his arms and just held her while she cried. He’d been watching from the kitchen window for the last few minutes. Now he rubbed her back. “One punch. Just let me get in one punch.”

She let out a chuckle and leaned against him a little more. “No. Don’t hurt him.”

“Why not? He deserves it.”

“Maybe, but Ava and Peanut still need a father, and you need a lead guitarist and songwriting partner.”

“He can still do all that missing a few teeth.”

She smiled and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For making me laugh. For caring.”

He shrugged. “You’re family.”

“Aunt Tori, come have cake!” Jake called from the door.

“Coming buddy!” She wiped her eyes and let Jon lead her back inside.